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 Post Posted: Wed Sep 16, 2009 4:16 am 
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Lazunaz Student
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I really like it, and you did a really good job on it.. keep up the good work that you do hon.. :d

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 Post Posted: Thu Sep 24, 2009 7:06 am 
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Lacunaz Master
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Because you keep demanding more. Here is another one, just think of a ballerina consisting of cogs and gears dancing in a theatre, steampunk, much?

Clockwork Ballerina

All eyes are focused on her
when she enters the stage
never will she age
never will her little heart stir

Her cogs and gears not all intact
the cracking noise she makes
when she gets off stage
her tutu starts to rip and fall apart

One day her leg fell to the ground
broken clockwork ballerina
a tube is her vena
all her cogs were making a sound

Alas, her expiring date was overdue
the clockwork theatre closing
the costumes decomposing
no one would ever fix a lose screw

The curtain closed, the lights dimmed
her fragile body taken apart
after all she had no heart
who want a ballerina, badly limbed

All her cogs and gears throws away
no one would have her
they do not prefer
a ballerina that won’t ever decay

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 Post Posted: Thu Sep 24, 2009 11:54 pm 
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Lacunaz Adept
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As usual really good poem. Very descriptive. From beginning to end I can envision the poem. I can't say I have heard of the word vena before. I had to look that one up. Thanks for posting.


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 Post Posted: Fri Sep 25, 2009 6:13 am 
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Lacunaz Master
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You know I took 5 years of Biology and listen to Angelspit. Vena is one of the most important veins in your body.

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 Post Posted: Sun Oct 04, 2009 9:04 pm 
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Lacunaz Master
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Location: On the third floor trying to find and kill you
An Airship to the Sun

Encouragement for exploration
Departing from an airship station
Trusting you with blind believe
While down below the women grieve
Their white handkerchiefs to say goodbye
When we fly out into the sky
Our journey has just begun
We are flying east, towards the sun,
but …
I didn’t know I would be,

Crashing through the atmosphere
The earth still shaking, coming near
Flames, licking tongues of sweet destruction
From alive to death in just a fraction
Hold your breath, pray for a safe return
Because your life will crash and burn

The sun burning bright on the windows
While worries about heat overshadows
the beauty of the shining star
leaving marks on the skin like a scar
The thrilling warmth pushing me away
while your want the course to stay
right into the burning sun
When the screws came undone
but …
I didn’t know I could be

Crashing through the atmosphere
The earth still shaking, coming near
Flames, licking tongues of sweet destruction
From alive to death in just a fraction
Hold your breath, pray for a safe return
Because your life will crash and burn

It does last minutes I was wide awake
contemplating which course to take
while crashing down upon the earth
Thinking it was nothing worth
Letting life go as I exhaustedly sigh
as my airship comes shooting through the sky
Knowing that the end was near
bleeding my final tear
because
I didn’t know I would be,

Crashing through the atmosphere
The earth still shaking, coming near
Flames, licking tongues of sweet destruction
From alive to death in just a fraction
Hold your breath, pray for a safe return
Because your life will crash and burn

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 Post Posted: Wed Nov 18, 2009 3:32 am 
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I'm a Loser?
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Patiently waiting for another


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 Post Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 10:21 am 
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Lacunaz Master
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I haven't written in a while, I just never come around to sit down and think and take the time. I have been up and down the road of depression, which makes me unable to actually do something artistic.

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 Post Posted: Wed Jan 06, 2010 7:55 am 
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Location: On the third floor trying to find and kill you
Winter smiles

winter as she smiles upon the dead
bound to earth by a thread
turning loving hearts to ice
cryins as they demise

A storm raging through the forest
where lost souls don`t rest
pittying those loving fools
being used as tools

Death plays with her new toys
lovely young naive boys
playing with their hearts
as she tears them apart

When their lovers die from the cold
they are the ones to behold
how cruel nature can be
because they don`t see


the smiles upon their lover`s faces


Four Steps

Pain
Misery
Despair
Death


Four Steps

Four steps
Four steps to healing
Just four steps away
Before I start peelings
Away the tattered skin
away the mortal sin,
the armoured pieces of heart,
I am tearing it apart.

Four steps
Four steps to dying
Four steps too close
while I am crying
tears of dreams gone by
of no of endless whys
Broken promises and pain
Of fighting and all in vain

Four steps
Four steps I know



World Collide


Another year has passed and another door has closed,
Behind my back the world falls down as I pose
For a picture to show the world who I am
But telling you the truth is not a thing I can
The world written on an empty paper
Are is as fleeting as warm vapour
While the buildings are crashing down behind me
I share my heart for you my friends and all to see
How heartaches and troubled thoughts collide
In my heart, leaving a dark cave to hide
In, and I sit there as a trembling leave
Listening for the world to fall, overhead
Because I even though I pose, I am dead
All the thoughts created in my feeble mind
The screams unnoticed, my body yet to find
The words dripping from my lips as I try to speak
The sentences pretending to be strong, but weak
As the trees are set on fire and the world will slowly burn
As I try to stumble forward, though my heart would rather run
All the fears put there inside me, when I cry and try again
Thousand lessons I have learned and I didn’t ran
Holding on to what I thought was real and true
wondering who I was and what I had to do
To overcome the obstacles in my path
To catch what was left of my last breath
And at the end of the world my strength has run out
While I fall down and see the last light go out
I lose my mind and lie down on the floor
to no longer breath, think or hurt no more
I’ve seen them before
when I planned to go
To leave this world behind
To part my body and mind
I have not entirely killed my heart
because suicide is an art


because

In the shadow you will hide
Behind the trees I will find
The skeletons of your past
The dream that wouldn’t last

The screams from the corridor
Over the misty moors
Death on it’s way for her
As the clouds gather and stir

Breathing close the her face
Leaving not even a trace
No way to track you down
To a house, village or town

Your plans to murder and kill
Have me in anxiety until
I run away and start a new life
Without fear and strife

You, are just concerned
And nothing more
My love has burnt
Up, still you believe in more

I wish I could give it all
Bring down my self-build wall
Love you like I am supposed to do
Because all I think of is you

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 Post Posted: Wed Jan 06, 2010 4:30 pm 
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Location: Celldwellering !!!!!
me likely, but maybe with:

Four steps
Four steps too close
and more steps to dying
while all are crying
tears of dreams gone by
filled of endless whys
Broken and hurting
from fighting and all in vain

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 Post Posted: Thu Jan 07, 2010 12:46 am 
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I'm a Loser?
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Thank you- the wait can be excruciating- but is well worth it-Luv it!!


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 Post Posted: Thu Jan 07, 2010 7:00 pm 
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Lacunaz Master
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Location: On the third floor trying to find and kill you
Spree of emoness is what creativity requires.

Chariot of Death

The voices screaming in my head
whispering thoughts of death
Soft tough turns into cold hands
and all life is under god`s command
When we take it out of self protection
we are put up for attitude correction

Sorrow and grief subside to anger
love becomes a threatening strangler
My heart long for that moment of peace
the last seconds before my eternal relief
The world looking down as I make my decision
as I make the final incision

Life comes pouring out of my heart
when for them my world falls apart
They don`t know I have been dead for too long
every day singing the same mournful song
I cut the strings of my own life
for once taking control of my strife

Making me invulnerable from hurt and pain
until the cycle starts again
and I drag myself behind a chariot of regret
because the faults I made I will not forget
One day I`ll take the knife to my heart
and for once tear my whole life and death apart

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 Post Posted: Sun Jan 10, 2010 4:33 pm 
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Lacunaz Master
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Location: On the third floor trying to find and kill you
Faerie Queen

She is high up, on her throne,
made of souls, made of bones.
Her cruel smile, from ear to ear,
she drains your hope, she feeds your fear.
A twisted mind, a hurting heart,
the world a game to tear apart.
No love is found deep down inside,
no pain, no fear, no grief, no spite.
Her castle black, to match her hair,
her skin so cold, but maiden fair.
A kiss would turn your heart to ice,
your life depending on some dice.
She plays the game and makes the rules,
she plays it foul, she plays it cruel.
Everybody sees her as heartless and strong,
but she won’t breathe, not for long.
Her every breath, hurts like hell,
but she’ll pretend she’s doing well.
When her time comes, to flee and die
her heart explodes because she can’t cry.
Out of her veins the crystals stream,
she won’t say a word, not even scream.
From her body a faeries flies,
a faerie made from layers of ice.
When the sun hits her wings will melt,
she’s always been afraid of the warmth she never felt.






This is all because you must hate my poetry by now.

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 Post Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2010 2:17 am 
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Wow-just killed my heart!


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 Post Posted: Sat Feb 13, 2010 11:52 pm 
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Lacunaz Master
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Posts: 12720
Location: On the third floor trying to find and kill you
Pain

Perpetual pain of the heart
small cuts making it fall apart

bandaged with lies of tomorrow
while all there is, is hurt and sorrow

As I pick up the pieces of yesterday
dropped down as they are dismay

bent, broken and losing the game
blood-letting for the insanity to stay sane

all the worries of the past should be gone
as the end of the world has just begun

Living is just another way to due
and all I wonder is why

We live in pain and swallow it like pills
a romantic film with photoshopped stills

Don't condemn me for choosing my own way out
better to know the end then to live in doubt

and if all my life will be branded with pain
I rather not live than to live a life in vain



I have also written a short story. I am sort of trying to make a collection of short helobi related stories about how teenagers cope with being gay or bisexual.


Nameless as of yet

I had picked the most comfortable seat, one that wasn't torn or smudged by whatever substance that was once dropped on them. The back on my shoulders hurt as I had walked for quite some time while my walk-man and cassettes kept me company. I planted my bag on the seat in front of me and pulled out the little table under the window, it made a scratching noise as I made the rusty screw move. I was grateful for the good weather, at least now I didn't have to worry about keeping myself warm at night anymore.

I turned my walk-man off and searched in the plastic bag for some descent scraps of food I had found and begged for. I pulled out the re-filled bottle of water and half a chicken sandwich still wrapped in it's paper-like wrapping. I slowly began eating the sandwich making sure that my stomach would feel filled for at least another 12 hours. when I was done eating, it too me long enough because when I looked out of the window of the train compartment it was dark outside, the lights of the city were shining dimly and deriding down on the people living there. I closed my eyes and the train began to move, slowly at first but within just a few seconds it was steaming at full speed. I open my eyes wide, the buildings around me passed by in rapid speed as the train shot ahead over the abandoned rail-tracks. This was not possible at all, this train-wreck has been standing on that abandoned station for years and most of the citizens didn't even know it existed, but still I felt the very real movements of the train.

I closed my eyes again hoping that this horrifying ideas of ghost-trains and crashing trains would go away. Around me the compartment was full of laughter, excitement and people! I opened my eyes and my mother was sitting next to me, her pale and ghostly-white face the most beautiful I had ever seen. I forgot that this could only be a dream and I closed my arms around her, surprisingly, warm body. For the first time since her funeral I cried, I hated her for leaving my alone with my homophobic father but I understand why she had done it and didn't blame her for wanting to escape a fate worse than death. I once asked, in a moment of complete rage and sadness, why he hated my mother so much and why he treated me the same. He yelled back, raising his hand above his head, ready to strike, that he would not allow sinners and unnatural feelings towards the same sex ruin his chance to get into heave. The next thing I know is that I woke up in the hospital after he gave me a blow again my head. My body was bruised and burnt, but it seemed that no-one believe what I told them and so I was send back home after a week. The same night I packed my bag and left home, never felt I happier than that night when I finally put feet outside the door and knew that my life was about to change. I didn't care that I had no home anymore and nowhere to turn to, at least I wouldn't be beaten up for as much as looking at another woman.

I looked up at my mother's eyes, they were as beautiful as ever and radiated the warmth and love I had only seen the morning when she gave me a hug, a kiss on the forehead and told me that she would miss me, just before I got picked up by the schoolbus. The tears were streaming down my face now, I wanted to smile but I couldn't, I had pretended a smile so much that I didn't know how to anymore. With a whispering voice I asked her the only question I had wanted to ask her in all those years without her: "Could I come with you, Mum?". To my surprise she nodded, her hair fell loosely around her shoulders and her perfect breasts. She put her arms around me and held me tight, the warmth flowed through my body from the tips of my fingers to my toes while the train rode on through green meadows with cows and small farms as if we were rode from panting to painting. Suddenly I was cold, it was not the biting cold that came when it froze but a gentle cold, it reached my chest and I knew that it was there. The world around me was black and in the distance I saw my mother, shining as bright as the sun holding out her hands and I knew it was forever, I was safe.[/b]

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 Post Posted: Fri Feb 19, 2010 11:11 pm 
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Lacunaz Master
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Location: On the third floor trying to find and kill you
Sunsets

See you when the Sun sets and the day ends
and we melt together with the horizon
standing on the sands of sadness
where the whispers of woe will hunt
together as one and we are the water
we are the ocean, surrounding the land
the storm rages on in silent march
fed by the words of silent tongues
their sentence falls down on our head
they’re are too blind to see but too stubborn to forget
we chase the tail of the tomorrow
starve the face of yesterday
while the moons is eaten by the stars
and the sun will laugh at our ridiculous life
the sand around our feed swirls
the whispers do not say a world
and while the ocean within us stirs
the water calmly falls down the edge of days
and the sunlight hits our face
when the sun winks at us just above the horizon
we stand there, in harmony separated
two souls, along the shores of tomorrow
disappearing when the veil of night falls down
in restless peace together, longing to be apart
their souls entwined, together sharing one organ
a beautiful beating heart

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