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 Post Posted: Thu Oct 14, 2004 2:06 pm 
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Lacunaz Adept
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Oh, I don't know how to be... I wanted to write something 'bout me but it had turned out something mixed up... Something's 'bout me, something's not...

"The Sinner"
She can't hide her sin
She has left it between
her heart and her soul

Many years had passed
But she only shudders
when he stands near her

She's awoken by the fears
She screams
She didn't say goodbye...
And never wondered why...

CH: [Her sin calls for the saviour
She got lost in herself
And ever she will hide
She will be lost inside...]

The man of her life
Won't ever return
And she wants to cry (he's not alive)

"Leave me alone"
she cries to the darkness (or into but the sense will be lost...)
"and never be back"

Her crime is calling
Inside her soul
But what will she do
with her heart's hole?

[Her sin calls for the saviour
She got lost in herself
And ever she will hide
She will be lost inside...]

Well, I'm waiting for your attitude :D


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 Post Posted: Thu Oct 14, 2004 5:02 pm 
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@cri...Very good! Did she kill him?

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 Post Posted: Thu Oct 14, 2004 5:22 pm 
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Lacunaz
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Damn, this is a good thread. There is some talent on these boards. Here's one of my older ones, but one of my favorites. It's a personal poem, but the few who have read it seemed to have it hit home with them as well, so I figure what the hell I can share it here...


Dark Skies

I stand alone in the pouring rain;
Life, it seems, is not the same.
Look up to dark skies above;
Wonder why I'm missing love.

The wind blows hard into my eyes;
I fight it back, wanting to cry.
The lightning cracks, the thunder starts;
Tree limbs break, just like my heart.

My dreams are shattered, I look away;
Not knowing quite what to say.
Fear grips my heart, holds me in place;
What would I say if I saw your face?

The sun peaks through, shows me a sign;
The clouds push back, now is not the time.
My piece of hope, my ray of light;
Briefly lit my eternal night.

I saw my chance, I gave my all;
Who could have known that I would fall?
I failed now, what does this mean?
I close my eyes, I fail to scream.

The storm rages on, no end in sight;
Forever lost, my ray of light.
My heart sinks down, just like a stone;
Memories flood me, still I'm alone.

I see you now as I saw you then;
So much more than just a friend.
I lost you once, and I lost my mind;
I seek the love I'll never find.

Where is my sign, I do not know;
Stronger still the storm winds blow.
My spirit screams,"Just let me be!"
My own thoughts imprison me.

I stand alone in the pouring rain;
Life will ever be the same.
Look up to black skies above;
Searching for my lost true love.

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 Post Posted: Thu Oct 14, 2004 5:34 pm 
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Wow, that's really good Schmoo-ster. It's very universal in its theme. And I love the imagery you use with the breaking tree limbs and the sun and clouds.



And I agree, this is a great thread. I should dig up some of my work.

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 Post Posted: Sat Oct 16, 2004 1:04 am 
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Schmoo wrote:
Dark Skies

I stand alone in the pouring rain;
Life, it seems, is not the same.
Look up to dark skies above;
Wonder why I'm missing love.

The wind blows hard into my eyes;
I fight it back, wanting to cry.
The lightning cracks, the thunder starts;
Tree limbs break, just like my heart.

My dreams are shattered, I look away;
Not knowing quite what to say.
Fear grips my heart, holds me in place;
What would I say if I saw your face?

The sun peaks through, shows me a sign;
The clouds push back, now is not the time.
My piece of hope, my ray of light;
Briefly lit my eternal night.

I saw my chance, I gave my all;
Who could have known that I would fall?
I failed now, what does this mean?
I close my eyes, I fail to scream.

The storm rages on, no end in sight;
Forever lost, my ray of light.
My heart sinks down, just like a stone;
Memories flood me, still I'm alone.

I see you now as I saw you then;
So much more than just a friend.
I lost you once, and I lost my mind;
I seek the love I'll never find.

Where is my sign, I do not know;
Stronger still the storm winds blow.
My spirit screams,"Just let me be!"
My own thoughts imprison me.

I stand alone in the pouring rain;
Life will ever be the same.
Look up to black skies above;
Searching for my lost true love.


All I can say is "WOW!!!"

I haven't read something that hit that close in a long time. You are an amazing writer...I'd love to hear more of your work...if you don't mind that is...

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 Post Posted: Sat Oct 16, 2004 7:19 am 
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Lacunaz
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Thanks you two. :oops: I'm not used to putting my stuff on display, but I'll see what else I can find and post it up.

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 Post Posted: Sat Oct 16, 2004 3:31 pm 
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Lacunaz Adept
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!ccfoo wrote:
@cri...Very good! Did she kill him?

Yes, she did... :cry: The same thing was in my heart - I've killed my own pain but I can't forget that guy... :cry: :cry: :cry: Just I can't think about sb else! And so I'm writing songs.... I don't think it's foolish, do I? Hm, I just need to be a singer... :?


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 Post Posted: Sat Oct 16, 2004 3:39 pm 
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@ Schmoo, wow!! :D You know, I do not know so many words but I understood everything!! 8) Guys, never be unhappy just to write sth like Schmoo! :D :D :D


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 Post Posted: Sat Oct 16, 2004 6:01 pm 
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Alright...this may sound inappropriate or what-not...but I'll let you interpret it as you will...let me know what you think...

I'm spiralling out of control
Drugs, sex, rock n roll
Here we go
The party's just begun
So spun
Lick me, touch me
Feed me some
Give me more
"More, now, again"
She said
Over and over
I like it rough
Hard core and tough
Bring me up
Let me catch my breath
Fresh sniff of air
Everybody stare
Watch me
Like it, love it
I rise above it
Ecstacy in motion
That tragic potion

I'm sorry if it is offensive at all...but I'm a firm believer in the freedom of expression through the written word...don't be too harsh...I'm kinda sensitive about my writing... :oops:

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 Post Posted: Sat Oct 16, 2004 6:06 pm 
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@greylady - nice flow. i imagine it being recited as they do at slams. very aggressive, yet elegant at the same time. different tones of voices for particular lines.

i agree. it takes a lot of time and courage to decide to have no holds barred when writing. i for one am a big fan of real writing. the kind that is raw and isn't ashamed to let the reader know what the hell is going on in your mind.


hope to see more from you :D

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 Post Posted: Sat Oct 16, 2004 6:22 pm 
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I just found this one...burried in the archives of my journals...thanks for this opportunity to go through some of these boxes...I haven't even thought about these in a long time...

Dearest Kevin
I wish you the best
The best of the worst in all
I wish you the pain...
And the terror...
And the hate
That I have felt for years
I wish for you to have
All the love in the world
And then have it taken away
In such a startling way
That your confusion
Overwhelmes you
I wish for you to trust
And then be betrayed
I do not wish you dead
That's the easy way out
I wish for you to suffer
In a spinning black hole
Of emotional hell
As I have for 15 sets...
Of 365 days...
Of 24 hours a day...
Of 60 minutes an hour...
Just as I have...
And I wish for you to know
That you have not broken me
I will learn to love
And I will learn to trust
And you no longer
Control my psyche
I wish for you to know
That I will beat you
At your own gruesome game
The bruises you left
On my tender flesh
Have disappeared already
And the scars you left
On my battered ego
Are slowly healing
I am almost there
Dearest Kevin...
I have almost won...
But you...
You will always be wrapped
In the thickest of fog
You...
You who thought I was dead
Dead to the world...
Dead to dreams...
Dead to myself...
You...
You will pay for eternity
For the misery I felt...
For the life you tried so hard
To remove from my fragile soul
But my light is revived...
I am still alive...
And I wish for you...
To remember...
That you are the weak one
The one that needed
To assault a small child
In order to feel powerful
I wish for you the best
The best of the worst
Dearest Kevin...

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 Post Posted: Sat Oct 16, 2004 9:19 pm 
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8O That was incredible. (I don't know if that's the right word, but I think you know what I mean.)

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 Post Posted: Sat Oct 16, 2004 9:46 pm 
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thanks guys... :P

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 Post Posted: Sat Oct 16, 2004 11:16 pm 
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Here's the opening to a book I'm writing...

Heart of Frost

Sailing high into the night sky,
I open my eyes, dare not to cry.
Above the clouds I touch the stars;
I believe this night is ours.

You left me up here all by myself;
There's nothing left there's no one else.
Emptiness starts to fill inside;
How is it you could let me die?

Looking down, I see your face,
No pain, no shame, you're a disgrace.
I feel as if you never cared;
All the wasted moments that we shared.

I can't imagine all that I lost
I can't imagine your heart of frost.
Believe in this, this much I know,
I'll follow you wherever you go.

Fill your head with worry,
Fill your mind with fright,
Give you the agony,
That I felt this night.

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 Post Posted: Sat Oct 16, 2004 11:21 pm 
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Here's one of my more recent ones.....probably pales in comparison to a lot of stuff people are posting here (some really impressive stuff I'm seeing here!), but here it is.....


Walkaway


Your cruel deception
Gave me all these scars
That’s all…
Its done…
I’m through…
Isn’t that quite enough?
Why you wanna make it hard?

I know I’ve got no need
No need to fight this fight
Now I’ll just walkaway
Just leave me be!
I need to simplify
I need to get away
I need to purify
I need to find my way

Don’t know why you keep up these lies
Try to draw me into battle
Seems you’re just paralyzed
I’ve no reason, I’ve no need to fight
I’m walking away…
I’m done with that…
You don’t realize
I’ve already won your war
I didn’t even need to fight
You’re the one who took you down

Won’t you just walkaway
You should just save your face
You only damn yourself
I no longer care!
Now I have simplified
Now I have walked away
Now I have purified
Now I have found my way

Its over now
There is no pain
I’m past it now
Don’t need the strain
I’ve walked the fuck away
(Can’t you do the same?)
The past is gone
Today I walkaway
(Just leave me be!)
Everything’s ahead
Just fucking walkaway!
(Stop burying yourself!)

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Sift through the dust for life, less burnt

----Nick----


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